Thursday, February 18, 2016

You can't judge on what you see


You know the saying “you can’t judge a book by it’s cover” well that is something which is so true. But it also goes beyond books, it goes to the way we judge the lady sitting at the next table with 3 kids who are loud, or the man walking down the street in a t-shirt in the winter, the loud music we hear next door, the person speeding past us on the highway, and so on. 

Maybe that lady is a single mom and this is the one chance they have of eating out this month so the kids are excited.

Maybe the man in a t-shirt gave a homeless man his jacket so he could stay warm.

Maybe the loud music next door is covering up the screams of a woman being beaten by her boyfriend/spouse.

Maybe the person speeding by you is on their way to the hospital to see a loved one before they die. 

We do not know the reason behind these things and in today’s society we have become so much more judgmental. We are all turning ourselves into the judge and jury not hearing anything at all onto why.  I will even admit that I do it myself.  Case in point the singer Ciara and the dress she wore to the Grammy’s on Monday. Okay yes it was very risqué and showed way too much skin, way too much and it was downright ugly. There is no argument there. I mean what is wrong with covering thighs and booty, because you can look just as beautiful with clothes on.  But so many of us, especially women, said that there must be more to this, that something else is going on. A lot are questioning how can this couple be following what they state?   (In case you do not know Ciara is in a relationship with Seattle Seahawk Quarterback Russell Wilson and they made recent headlines when stating they will be abstinent until they get married. When it comes to Russell Wilson or any of the other Seahawk boys, this household takes is SERIOUSLY!! We are part of the Seahawk nation and have been since the beginning and always will be. I even have Seahawk plates on my car thank you very much! Plus it helps my oldest could be his younger brother lol)



With my job I do a lot of walking and it makes me think a lot on different subjects.  While doing it today I stopped and realized what right do I have to judge Ciara and to assume that there is something more going on?  In reality it was almost like saying that a woman deserves to be sexually assaulted because of what she wore.  When we see a woman in certain clothing or lack of clothing we immediately think of sex and often that she is a slut or tramp and is deserving of whatever she gets. NO woman should be judged like that EVER!! I mean consider it what would have happened if a guy wore something risqué where it showed his bare legs, his package or anything else in more sight, we would be saying the same things? We would be saying oh there is something sexual about it and he must be asking for it.  No we would not be at all.  That is the world’s harsh reality and what we have become because of social media.  We are so quick to judge and never hear the whole story. So honestly how do we know that she was not trying to make a statement herself and get the reaction so she could bring more awareness to social media, judging and sex?

Trying to find the right book to what I have written is hard because there are so many that touch it on several sides. Whether it is a woman trying to break it into the sports world, overcome the odds of being a single parent…. One author seemed to stand out though and that is Jeannie Moon.  



A Forever Love Story series is excellent from the start but the sixth and final story “Because I Love You” shows that you cannot judge a person by what they look like, what they do, or the way they sound. 

Tristan Wade came from a strong British household in true fashion.  As the middle child out of five he never had to worry about being alone.  He took the smarts he had inherited from his parents to the next level and become a successful businessman. So when he was given the opportunity to buy out Nate Bayard’s partnership in Reliance Software a company that was doing incredible, he TOOK it.  He was surprised though when he found out that there was a bonus that came with the partnership…Nate’s sister Leah!

Leah Bayard is a hard nose lawyer who really had to prove herself to the legal world like so many other women do while trying to work her way up the ladder. Of course it didn’t help that she often speaks before she thinks and comes across as a cold-hearted bitch to others.  But Leah was also a firm example that that you cannot judge someone by their looks or even actions. On the inside she was a mess.  She had always felt like she was the ugly duckling compared to her sister Amy.  It seemed like every time they went out, the men would only pay attention to Amy, not Leah. Then one time when she actually gave her full heart, the jerk crushed it like a rotten tomato, causing her to decide that she would never love again. 

That was until she met Tris and her heart boomed so loud she was sure they could hear it on Mars, her knees were weak and she was putty in his hands.  So she decided to play it safe and told him straight up that there would be no relationship at all, only “friends with benefits”.  Tris reluctantly agreed to it, hoping and praying that he could bring down the front that she had up.  Leah needed to see that loving someone again was possible, that it would be real and no one would be hurt.  If she just took the chance. 

Jeannie Moon is a wonderful wife, marvelous mother, tremendous teacher and lavishing librarian who has managed to put the words in her head into best selling books.  If you are interested in the book here are links to it, just be careful that you do not get too addicted like I have ;)  http://jeanniemoon.com/



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